close up photo of two person s holding hands

What Happened To Courting, Huh?

More often than not, I encounter men and think I like them… until they talk to me. My word!!!

Recently this guy came to me while I was chilling on the couch; he’s been trying to get with me and my friend says he likes me, anyway, he came and said he wants to f#! Me. My natural reaction when he said that was an eye roll.

Really??? How disrespectful! I guess you could say he’s the one who prompted me to write this here post.

Growing up I’d hear many stories about how dating is and when I started dating, it seemed like the older I got, the more my dating style deviated from that fantasy I created in my head from other’s experiences.

At 20 something years old, 90% of the guys that approached me just want sex. Even the ones that claim they like me talk about sex.

a man handing a bouquet of flowers to the woman
Photo by Pavel Danilyuk on

What Happened to Courting?

Ideally, I would want to get to know someone first before even thinking about sex but this hookup culture that we have right now doesn’t make it easy for women like me who actually want to date with a purpose. It’s easy to weed out those who aren’t worthy of your time when people are upfront and honest but not everyone is like that. 

I have learned to really listen to what a guy says. I believe that if a person is interested in you for the right reasons then they will court you. They’ll actually take you out on dates even before making it official and try to get to know you on a deeper level because they don’t have time for all the superficial B.S.

Don’t care what anyone says, I still believe there are men out there that love spoiling their woman and want to do sweet things for her like plan romantic dates and get her flowers or whatever. I don’t get why some men think things like that are lame? 

close up photo of two person s holding hands
Photo by Git Stephen Gitau on

Guess if you didn’t have a father like that and never saw your mom being treated like a queen then you don’t really have that image of how a woman should be treated. I hope you guys don’t get me wrong and think I want someone who is going to necessarily buy flowers. I just want someone who is going to treat me like a lady and that dude my friends say is into me is NOT that.

I’ve decided I am never going to settle for less than I deserve again. I think way too many of us ladies do that and we really shouldn’t. It’s true when they say that we teach people how to treat us. When we allow people to get away with treating us poorly, we are indirectly telling them that it’s okay. This year I am putting my foot down, never again! 

To all the gentlemen who are reading this (well I hope you’ll read this), make courting cool again!
Also read: Sweet & Fun Date Ideas

A true-crime-obsessed, quirky lifestyle blogger from the coastal city of East London, South Africa whose interests include reading, writing and fitness. Find me on Twitter @WeirdnLiberated.
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50 thoughts on “What Happened To Courting, Huh?

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